{"product_id":"gildan-heavy-cotton-t-shirt-spices-color-master","title":"British Empire Funny T-Shirt – History Spice Joke Sarcastic Graphic Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eFunny British history T-shirt featuring the “Conquered Half the World for the Spices – Refused to Use Them” graphic, printed on a Gildan Heavy Cotton G5000 unisex tee.\u003cbr\u003eA sarcastic history design built around a very confident Victorian-era explorer, a Union Jack and an impressive pile of spices — followed by the inevitable question of why British food still ended up needing gravy.\u003cbr\u003eThe artwork mixes vintage colonial-poster styling with dry British humour, making it a strong choice for history fans, sarcasm lovers and anyone who appreciates a joke that takes several centuries to set up.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTHE DESIGN\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eConquered Half the World for the Spices – Refused to Use Them combines:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e- vintage British explorer artwork\u003cbr\u003e- Union Jack details\u003cbr\u003e- sacks of spices and herbs\u003cbr\u003e- retro cream and gold typography\u003cbr\u003e- distressed poster-style illustration\u003cbr\u003e- dry British history humour\u003cbr\u003e- warm red, gold, beige and brown tones\u003cbr\u003eThe result is deliberately over-the-top vintage imperial imagery used as the setup for a very British food joke.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eT-SHIRT DETAILS\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePrinted on the Gildan Heavy Cotton T-Shirt G5000.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e- Classic unisex fit\u003cbr\u003e- Midweight fabric\u003cbr\u003e- Ribbed crew neck\u003cbr\u003e- Taped neck and shoulders\u003cbr\u003e- Tubular body\u003cbr\u003e- Twin-needle sleeves and bottom hem\u003cbr\u003e- High-detail DTG print\u003cbr\u003e- Printed individually to order\u003cbr\u003eColour-specific fabric:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e- Navy: 100% cotton, 185 gsm\u003cbr\u003e- Military Green: 100% cotton, 185 gsm\u003cbr\u003e- Graphite Heather: 50% cotton \/ 50% polyester, 185 gsm Inkthreadable\u003cbr\u003eThe G5000 has a traditional straight-cut unisex silhouette rather than a fitted fashion shape.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFIT \u0026amp; SIZING\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is a classic unisex fit.\u003cbr\u003eChoose your usual size for a standard fit, or size up if you prefer something more relaxed.\u003cbr\u003ePlease check the size guide in the listing images before ordering. Measurements are provided in centimetres and inches.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eCOLOURS\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAvailable in:\u003cbr\u003eNavy – deep blue with strong contrast against the cream, red and gold artwork.\u003cbr\u003eMilitary Green – an earthy olive-green option that works especially well with the vintage explorer and spice-market palette.\u003cbr\u003eGraphite Heather – a charcoal-grey heather with a softer, more casual texture and slightly different fabric composition.\u003cbr\u003eBecause Graphite Heather is a cotton\/polyester blend, its surface and finished print appearance may vary slightly from the solid cotton colours. Inkthreadable\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePRINT\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe artwork is applied using DTG printing, allowing the small spice details, facial features, vintage lettering and colour transitions to reproduce without the heavy feel of a large vinyl transfer.\u003cbr\u003eEach garment is printed individually to order, so very small differences in placement or colour may occur.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eCARE\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWash inside out at 30°C.\u003cbr\u003eWash with similar colours.\u003cbr\u003eDo not bleach.\u003cbr\u003eDo not tumble dry.\u003cbr\u003eDo not iron directly over the artwork.\u003cbr\u003eCenturies of global spice trade went into this joke.\u003cbr\u003ePlease don’t ruin it in one hot wash.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMADE TO ORDER\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEach shirt is produced specifically after an order is placed.\u003cbr\u003eProduction and fulfilment are handled by our UK production partner, Inkthreadable.\u003cbr\u003ePlease check the estimated delivery date at checkout before ordering.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eABOUT THE ARTWORK\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eConquered Half the World for the Spices – Refused to Use Them is an original Bite Your Tongue concept developed for our Sarcasm \u0026amp; Bad Advice collection.\u003cbr\u003eThe artwork combines vintage historical illustration with modern dry humour, using an exaggerated explorer-poster aesthetic as the setup for the punchline.\u003cbr\u003eAI-assisted creative tools form part of our design process, alongside concept development, art direction, selection, refinement, correction and final preparation for print.\u003cbr\u003eEach finished artwork is developed as part of the Bite Your Tongue catalogue rather than uploaded as an unedited stock graphic.\u003cbr\u003eBITE YOUR TONGUE\u003cbr\u003eWear what you think.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Bite Your Tongue","offers":[{"title":"Military Green \/ Small","offer_id":59180900974856,"sku":"GD05-MGR-S","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ Medium","offer_id":59180901007624,"sku":"GD05-MGR-M","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ Large","offer_id":59180901040392,"sku":"GD05-MGR-L","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ X-Large","offer_id":59180901073160,"sku":"GD05-MGR-XL","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ 2X-Large","offer_id":59180901105928,"sku":"GD05-MGR-2XL","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ 3X-Large","offer_id":59180901138696,"sku":"GD05-MGR-3XL","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ 4X-Large","offer_id":59180901171464,"sku":"GD05-MGR-4XL","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ 5X-Large","offer_id":59180901204232,"sku":"GD05-MGR-5XL","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ Small","offer_id":59180901237000,"sku":"GD05-NAV-S","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ Medium","offer_id":59180901269768,"sku":"GD05-NAV-M","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ Large","offer_id":59180901302536,"sku":"GD05-NAV-L","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ X-Large","offer_id":59180901335304,"sku":"GD05-NAV-XL","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2X-Large","offer_id":59180901368072,"sku":"GD05-NAV-2XL","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3X-Large","offer_id":59180901400840,"sku":"GD05-NAV-3XL","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4X-Large","offer_id":59180901433608,"sku":"GD05-NAV-4XL","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5X-Large","offer_id":59180901466376,"sku":"GD05-NAV-5XL","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite Heather \/ Small","offer_id":59180901499144,"sku":"GD05-GHR-S","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite Heather \/ Medium","offer_id":59180901531912,"sku":"GD05-GHR-M","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite Heather \/ Large","offer_id":59180901564680,"sku":"GD05-GHR-L","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite Heather \/ X-Large","offer_id":59180901597448,"sku":"GD05-GHR-XL","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite Heather \/ 2X-Large","offer_id":59180901630216,"sku":"GD05-GHR-2XL","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true},{"title":"Graphite Heather \/ 3X-Large","offer_id":59180901662984,"sku":"GD05-GHR-3XL","price":19.99,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1072\/6866\/9704\/files\/ChatGPT_Image_21_Sept_2026_21_24_03.png?v=1793218363","url":"https:\/\/shop.biteyourtongue.uk\/products\/gildan-heavy-cotton-t-shirt-spices-color-master","provider":"Bite Your Tongue","version":"1.0","type":"link"}